Is Love Overrated?
We put love on trial — literally. Drew and I squared off in a full debate over whether romantic love is overrated. I made the case that love is basically your brain’s con man, a neurochemical hijacking designed to make you delusional about deeply flawed people, and that the most intoxicating relationships are often the most toxic. Drew fought back with the evidence that love is the foundation of social infrastructure, physical health, and long-term happiness. By the end, we came to a gentlemen’s agreement: a framework that explains why we’re all chasing the wrong kind of love, and what the right kind actually looks like.
Episode Notes
Referenced in This Episode
- Helen Fisher
- Prairie voles
- Oxytocin
- Arginine vasopressin
- Parental investment theory
- Harvard Study of Adult Development (Harvard Happiness Study)
- Robert Waldinger
- Jane Eyre
- Jeremy Bentham
- John Stuart Mill
- Leo Tolstoy
- Anna Karenina
- War and Peace
- Dark triad
- Love bombing
- Attachment theory
- The Gottman Institute
- Helen Fisher's three loves framework
- John Lennon
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